


Just Another Reality

by Maiera



Series: Just Another Series [2]
Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Elvhen Pantheon, F/M, Headcanon, Plaidweave, Plaidweave everywhere, Romance takes a backseat
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-05
Updated: 2016-04-01
Packaged: 2018-05-11 11:17:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5624881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maiera/pseuds/Maiera
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Inquisitor, Danielle Cooper, finds herself with more power than she even really knows what to do with. We delve into more of the future and the past!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Things Begin Again

**Author's Note:**

> This piece is a sequel to Just Another Fantasy, and does require that you've read it beforehand, since explanations are few and far between in this series. Enjoy the show!

She found Herself in the old house again. The old mahogany floors were a comforting sight, at least for a while. She remembers how this dream always ends. The screams from the kitchen. The embers spreading across the old floorboards. She walks outside leisurely and finds Herself and Her friend, just returning from the road. Her young face, lit by the flames in horror. She closes Her eyes and wakes up.

I find a dog and some yellow floof in my bed. The dog is probably the reason my legs feel like static. My brain is still too fuzzy to process whatever the floof is, so I just start getting dressed.

It's been about a week since Corypheus was killed, so naturally every major power and their mother wants to meet up with me! Joy of joys... Anyways! That means I have a solid week of politics ahead of me. Two days for Orlais, then Tevinter, then Ferelden, then only one day talking to ambassadors from Par Vollen. For now, I brush up on my French as I brush my hair.

The yellow floof rises out of the bed and my mind registers it as Cullen! Cullen? When...? Oh well, if it's important, he'll mention it. "Morning, Ramen Hair!"

"Already? Is it diplomacy? You don't need me, do you?" He runs a finger through his hair. I think I have... ah, here it is! I find a small tub in my vanity drawer and toss him his hair gel.

"Um... Yes, yes and probably. It's Josie running this circus, you know how she gets." You'd think becoming a god would give me a looser stranglehold on Josie's end. You would be very, very wrong. "By the way, we have the Orlesians to deal with. If anyone asks, I taught you Orlesian with help from Leliana. Lels already figured it out on her own, so that should hold up enough for the snooties."

"Did May make any leeway on her plan yet?" I materialize and toss him an outfit, along with his floof on the sofa.

"Last I heard she was forging papers with one of the linguists, printed English is proving a nice challenge for them apparently. Hey- help me with this zipper." Zzzp. Ah, perfect.

"Ah, am I to be matching you this time?" I had given him a creme suit and red tie, which incidentally matched my sunset dress. The threads actually reflect light, giving the dress a glow effect.

"Yeah, may as well, right? Not like I have to worry about a tailor, may as well spread the love. I sent outfits to Lels and Josie last night, too." I give him a little twirl to show off my fanciness. "I hope you appreciate this shit. It's probably more expensive than the entirety of Honnleath. This fabric doesn't even technically exist."

He's playing with Noodle's paws, how cute! "You look stunning. Whether it be in the most expensive dress, or in your raggedy hoodie and jeans."

"Aww, you know just what to say!"

He laughs until he gets a dog paw to the mouth. "You had entirely set that up, and you know it."

"True, true... Well! Time to go and appease the public."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we're off!


	2. Things and Elders

"I am not some frail, decaying creature that needs coddling."

"Yes you are, old man. You're so old you may as well be a fossil!"

Abelas came by! It's now Saturday, and all the politics we had scheduled is mostly done! But, the old elves and a certain old woman decided to drop by and make my workload even heavier!

"I'm only a few centuries older than you are. And- stop that! Put me down, I can walk just fine! How is it you leave for a few measly months and become even worse than before?" Din'lathelan and Abelas have been bonding.

I quietly sip my tea as Solas seems to be offended by its presence. Flemythal and i seem to have the same idea as we just wait it out.

A certain soldier walks through just in time to interrupt Din trying to do... something. She's clinging onto his back and by the looks of it failing at what she intended. "Ser, the Commander asked when you and the others would be done with the meeting, I just need-" He looks up at the scene. "Err... Just need an E.T.A. for the end." I wonder what life is like for Fucking Jim. Always has the funniest timing.

"At this rate? No earlier than midnight. Remind him to feed Noodle." Puppy needs protien!

"Of course, ser." Jim leaves to report back to Cullen.

"On that note, we should talk about what comes next." Mythal leans back in her chair, steepling her fingers. "You've changed reality, dear. Now let's take advantage of that."

"I know that face. You have a plan. Lemme hear it." I lean forward, resting my chin in my hands.

"Well, with two thirds of the Pantheon remaining both are focused on contolling our Wolf here,"

"I'm not that bad!"

"Yes you are, Da'fen. Despite that, we now have major sway over the world again. If we are to fix your mistake, we cannot go through with some half-baked plan. We saw what that road ends in. The worst case scenario here is not light. A majority of the population dead, the rest unstable mages with a new lifestyle to learn."

I then choose to interject. "Buut... Best case scenario is only a few idiots die, elves get their Tolkien Status back, and we don't get caught up in beurocracy along the way!"

"Tolkien Status?" Abelas is pushing away Din's face with an incongruently serious face.

"Oh, yeah. He made the basis for elves in Earth culture. Tall, graceful, immortal, magically superior. You guys have like, three of those four things!"

Mythal gently chuckles. "Indeed, currently, they both seem to lack grace. However, that would be a near impossible standard for all of the time."

Din managed to get on Abelas' back and is sitting on his shoulders triumphantly. "Oh, yeah. Elvhen puberty is a bitch. Magic and emotional outbursts for a dozen decades, give or take, how fun."

"Well, you all don't have to worry about growing body hair. Being human is gross. Anyways! You said you had a plan?"

"Indeed. As I mentioned, we now have one of the most renowned organizations under our command, I propose we use that to our advantage." She takes a sip of her wine. "Spread the word among the elves first, I'm told you have quite a few workers who you have personally helped?"

"Oh, yeah! I guess they would be the best place to start as far as public relations... Already devoted to not only my cause, but to me specifically. More likely to be receptive to the Pantheon being a reality. I know we have direct relations with at least one of the Dalish clans, two if we bring in Merrill's family. Lavellans and Mahariels. Alerions? I forget, actually. Then there's the clan that the Warden and your daughter had saved, I'm certain they would help..."

"Why are you focusing so much on the Dalish?" Solas looks at me the same way he looks at my tea.

"Common sense? City elves are mainly Andrastian, Tevinter elves don't have enough freedom to be of much use even if they were to support us - unless we need someone on intel over there, but the Dalish... They're already very pious and to learn not one, but two of the Gods have been among them this whole time? And that they plan on rebuilding the Empire? They would be putty in our hands, for better or for worse!"

"Din'lathelan, when you said she often thought of Elvhen politics, you did not mention she already had a plan of her own."

"I did mention the healthy cynicism, though."

"Oh, no, yeah. I'm in new territory here! So exciting, not knowing what comes next! I've read a bunch of stories where they work to get Elvhenan back, some work, some don't as much... But they all work as good references. What I haven't seen was a really long-term approach, though."

"Are you going to have one of your Sera Speeches again?" Snippy Solas is snippy...

"Shut up, Egghead. The grown ups are talking."

"You're seventeen! We are immortal! If anything, you are a literal infant!"

"Yes, well this 'literal infant' convinced you to give them divinity. And saved the planet from your mess."

"We- I- ... Ugh, continue..."

"Thank you! Besides, eighteen now, thank you very much. Appreciated the gift." There was none. My birthday was forgotten. Except for May, we went on a cruise to the Bahamas for a month! "Anywho, we have time. Most of the reform stories work with a mortal head. Mortals think in terms of deadlines, always. 'Can I get this done in time', 'Is this worth my time', stuff like that is commonplace nowadays. But now, we really don't have to worry about anything like that, which I find I need to remind myself very often... Unless I'm still on a two year time limit, in which case, Fuck you, Solas."

"What was that for?"

"For if our fix fails and I need to lose an arm and/or die because you lost your chew toy."

"It isn't a chew toy..."

"No, just a big ball owned by a canine. You're right, I'm wrong. Sure. Anyways! Re-education. Start with the elves, worm some new teachings into the chantry, deal with the Qun, and reassure dwarves. Slowly introduce them to more liberal mindsets, and we can get it done within two centuries max."

"People's minds are not so easily swayed, little one..."

"Maybe not for you stubborn Elvhen, but the mortals? I've seen it with my own eyes. Two centuries in my home country, we had slaves removed, women treated as equals, racism dropped seriously, fewer wars, less homophobia, I'm telling you. If we can get the ball rolling, eventually newer generations will just keep it going on their own."

Din hops off of Abelas' back. "You know, I kind of like mortal mentality. It's entertaining."

"Yeah, people are funny like that. They only have so much time, all anyone really wants is to make the most of it."


	3. Things and a Storyteller

"How on Earth can you possibly be this calm, Dani?!" May finds herself pacing around my room and wearing down the rug. Lovely.

"Because... I have no clue why you're freaking out, honestly. Was there a memo I missed or something?" Meanwhile, I just sat on my bed, still in my jammies.

"Apparently! The Warden's been found! She is coming here! To Skyhold! To meet you!"

"Oh, well... yeah? I mean, I'm an ally to the Wardens, with no need for conscription. Makes sense that Lingrean would want to meet up with me in order to make use of our resources. Why, exactly, are you freaking out about this?"

"Because it's the Warden! And your perfect save file, at that! She's essentially an idol." She's started to calm down a little at least.

"Yeah? I mean, I'm a god, so..."

"Wait- what?" Oh.

"Nobody... told you?"

"Told me what." Less question, more menacing order.

"Uh, Solas gave me divinity in the hopes that the mark wouldn't kill me?"

"I thought you were kidding when you suggested that as a plan, Danielle!"

"Yeah, well... I saw an opportunity to become even more awesome, and I took it, more or less. Besides, it was the plan with the best chance of success and being effective for my goals."

"Ugh... fine. Sure. What are your goals with Corypheus out of the way?"

"Well, as Sera put it, 'Elvhen Glory!'" I dissolved into a fit of laughter, May eventually joining me.

"So, what? You're ditching Cullen for Solas?"

"Oh, hell no. I meant actual Elven Liberation."

"Dani no."

"Dani yes! I mean, I already saved the world once! Dude, if I could make it better, why the hell not, you know?"

"Yeah, but you aren't going along with Solas' plans, are you?"

I laughed. Loudly. And for a very long time. "Haaa, it's like you don't even know me. Hell no! Reeducation. Then, we announce that it'll eventually happen, giving people time to prepare. That generation, we teach the basics of magic, on top of the more liberal mindset towards spirits from right now onwards, and the transition back will be much smoother. Meanwhile, Solas does his Fadey thing and gives the spirits warning of the change as well, so as not to make it too jarring for them to handle."

"That's... Not a bad plan. On paper at least. But have you accounted for the variables?"

"Nope. May, I am not nearly as calculating as you are. That's why I have the Tall, Old and Broody club around." I get up and dig up an outfit for the day, and add in a nasally voice "Now, if you'll excuse me, princess." 

"Oh my god, you're terrible. Go on, get ready..." She leaves with a lot less stress than before at least.

I end up just wearing a sweater dress and some thick leggings today. Believe it or not, mountain fortresses can get cold. Who would've guessed?

"Oh, hey! Think you could spare a second on an old pal, Sunshine?" Varric had been hanging out at his impromptu office by the fireside when he noticed me coming down.

"Sure, what's up?" I sit down across from him, already making myself comfy.

"As you know, I have a book in the works about all this. I was hoping maybe you could tell me that long story about before you fell into our laps now?"

"Oh, well... uhm. I mean, sure, but..." I lower my voice. "Maybe somewhere else?"

"Well, already proving interesting, then."

"You ass, come on."

We both head back up to my room, where he lets out a low whistle.

"Never been up here, but now I'm regretting that. Nice setup you have here."

"Thanks. Oh, but yeah. Backstory, right? Just saying, please don't go telling the whole world... I mean, dropping hints about it is fine, but I don't need some big pity party. If you're writing the Inquisition's story, please don't paint me as a tradgedy character, okay?"

He furrows his brows and becomes much more serious. "That bad, huh kid?"

"Yeah... So the story starts about three years ago. It was New Year's Eve, and we were hosting a party. The manor was a lot more lively than usual, since a new marriage meant more family to have over. May's dad had gotten married to one of my Mom's sisters. They had actually met at one of my birthday parties. Anyways. May and I were still excited about becoming family. We were joined at the hip, essentially. Anyways, it was about half an hour to midnight, and a fair amount of the adults were drunk. Mom had asked for me to go and grab her bag from her car. It had her migraine medication and she knew she would be needing it in the morning. So, May and I had taken a walk, down to the driveway, which was pretty long, mind you, and we had gotten the bag. As we turned around..." It's a memory. It's a story now. "There was a gas leak from the stove. No one noticed the hissing over the sounds of the party. Someone decided to light a cigarette or something. We never found out what exactly had ignited the flames, but by the time we had gotten close, the beams holding up the cieling of the foyer had collapsed... Nobody else survived." A breath to steady myself. "Very few of them had actually written their wills, even fewer included me or May in them. We were both considered minors, anyways, so any money would be kept by the banks or the government or whatever until we had gotten older. May's family wasn't as well off to begin with, so the inheritance she got went straight towards housing and bills. We were both kind of holding out for this year, when my inheritance would be given. My dad did mastering for musicians. Some of them were even international celebrities. My mom was a scientist, she worked on energy efficiency for the most part. I'm pretty sure we were an old money family, but I just didn't think on it too much back then. I had my family and a decent sized playground and a pool. I didn't need much else." Another breath. Smile. "Anyways. After that, May and I kept up through Skype as we were lost in the foster care system, and when May was old enough, she became my new legal guardian, and we got an apartment together. I technically owned the manor still, but I couldn't afford the renovations necessary until I got my inheritance money, much less the upkeep. Then, as we were getting close to the home stretch, boom. Thedas. You know the rest."

A bit of silence as he tries to process my tale. "Well... I guess that would explain why you're so good at the Game. You're a secret noble?"

"Ha, more or less, yeah. I mean, no famcy title or anything, just had a family sitting on mad cash. I mean, you can say the same, but I don't see you getting all snobby."

"To be fair, most of my money went into babysitting in Kirkwall."

"True... By the way, how's the eluvian working for you?"

"Actually, really well if you don't count the terrible nausea every single time I go through there. Was the yellow paint stripe between the two necessary?"

"Yes. What if you have others with you and they get lost? What if you get drunk and can't tell which mirror to go through?"

"There are only two working ones."

"Well... Not for long, maybe. Oh! Shit! I gotta warn Solas about that!" I dash to the stairs. "Sorry! This is really important!"

I sprint into the rotunda where Solas and Abelas are pouring over some old tome. "Pride, Sorrow. Don't mess with the eluvians. Bad time. Detemmienation. Haha. Wait- sorry. Not the time. If you restore them, the Qunari are gonna try and take over the world with them. No more eluvians than necessary until they can be neutralized."

Abelas just slowly looks between Solas and I. "She is usually like this?"

"Unfortunately, yes. Until you get her going on about elves or politics, at least."

"Shut your trap, Egghead. Not my fault you guys can't keep up!"

Solas rests his forehead in his hand. "Whatever you say, Danielle..."


	4. Things and a Phoenix

I was standing on the fence in the Roost. "Hey, Leliana?"

She looked up from her paperwork or letter writing, something boring. "Is there anything you need, or are you just here to be a distraction?"

"Did you and Lingrean bang? I never finished that playthrough. I knew that one'd either be you or Zevran, but..." I trail off there after noticing her face. "I... will take that as a yes. Oh my me, you're so red right now, this is beautiful."

"It was... a momentary lapse in judgement. We eventually decided against it."

"Ohohooo! This is beautiful! Two thirds of my advisors pined over the same girl! Oh, man. I know Morrigan won't romance a girl, but who's to say with the real world? Jesus, if we had Hawke here, we could all start up a harem. I bet Bull'd be up for it. Zevran would. He's like an elfy Antonio Banderas. Fenris would initially object, but if Eden asked he would be down. We need everybody! Gather the Blight Buddies and the Kirkwall Crew, Lels! I want a hero party!"

"You aren't seriously going to start a harem are you?"

"No, I'm jokingly starting a harem. Shits and giggles. Invitation only. It's a joke, not crude. High class joke harem, let's do it."

She just looked at me for a while, while I perched myself onto her desk. "Inquisitor, no. I won't start a harem for you. Besides, if the employees were only those who helped with world saving, then who else would save it next week?"

"Wait, what's next week?" By this point, most of the agents are listening in. They think they're so sneaky.

"Nothing. But in this day and Age? I give it two months before another catastrophe."

"Fair point. Two near apocalypses, two revolutions. I think about four? Four wars right now? No, wait. We stopped two, no, three? So wierd thinking about how much we've accomplished by dicking around."

"No, you were the only one doing that. The rest of us worked hard, thank you very much."

"You started house training nugs last week."

"I am telling you, they can be very useful when prop-"

One of the agents stalked up the stairs, hiding thier face with their hood. "E-excuse me, Lady Nightingale, Inquisitor. The group has arrived ahead of schedule, they're here now."

Leliana seemed genuinely startled for a moment, there. "Okie dokie. Take me to their leader!" I hop off the desk and follow the agent down to the courtyard, where I find the familiar group. Zevran, Shale, Morrigan, Leliana, and an elven mage with her deep purple hair in a bun. Mods. Gotta love em.

A pair of glowing orange eyes settle on me. "You must be Danielle. I've heard quite a bit about you, ser." Oh my god, she speaks!

"Oh please, no need for formalities here, I've seen most of you naked. Well, in your smalls, but still. Anyways! Howsabout we take this to the basement?"

As I turn to the stairs, I hear Lin murmur to Zevran, "I am fairly certain I would've remembered something like that..."

We reach the metal door to the rec room. "Imma show you all the biggest secret in this place. Well, besides whatever it is Leliana does... Brace yourselves."

I hear a soft gasp, a wolf whistle, and a soft grunt of approval upon entering the room.

"Over there's the safe where we keep our mad cash, there's the gaming area, and over here, we have the movie night nook. Down that hallway is imported alcohol of many varieties, and down that one's the kitchens. Don't bother asking for refills for the snack table, I'm the only one who can get this stuff."

"I have never seen a snack so... red." Zevran eats a handful of hot fries. "Ha! Now that has a kick to it! I like it!" He grabs the whole bowl of them and joins the rest of us by the desktop.

"So, here we have the computer! This is a gateway to parallel worlds, and even to this one." I open up the file to Lingrean, and it shows her in the middle of camp. "This is you. You have mostly everybody by this point, I think? No Ohgren yet. You've gotten in touch with the Circle and the Dalish so far... I was planning on doing the Dwarves next." A snicker from Zevran. "Any questions?"

"Just the one. How?"

"Science. You know how the dwarves havemachines and mechanisms and junk? Well, my home is like that. But better. Anyways! I was showing you guys this for a reason."

"And what, exactly would that be?" She narrows her eyes at me. Christ, that's creepy in person.

"I wanted you to know the basis of knowledge I have on you all before negotiations. I have a plan. And some rather valuable information for the elves."

"And what do you want in exchange?"

"Mm... support, or at the very least, cooperation. I think it's a cause you can get behind. You may be snarky, but you're still a scholar at heart. My information includes the whereabouts of a Creator, as well as several living ancient elves."

"Inquisitor, has she given you permission to just out her like that?"

"Morrigan, it'll come out sooner or later. We have all the time in the world. I'm sure she wouldn't mind."

Lin looks wary, but not as suspicious of me when she figures out Morrigan knows who I mean. "What's the plan?"

"In short? Elven revolution. The longer version is erasing all the negative propaganda about you all- elves and mages -while properly educating people on the subject instead of glossing it over."

A few minutes pass as she mulls it over. "...Fine. But I don't see why you would need me for this job."

"Because you're the most popular elf of this age? With direct ties to the King of Ferelden, as well as having good relations with every major player this side of Thedas. I mean, if we can get you vouching for us, then that would be a huge boost, not including the personal ties to the cause that you have." I relax in my swivel chair.

"And what about this information you claim to have?" She crosses her arms.

"Well. You remember Flemeth, yes?"

"Don't change the subject."

"I'm not. She's Mythal. I also have, in this very fortress right now, two of her top Sentinels, from before the Fall."

"Wh-How exactly do you know this?"

"Objective observation, the fact that we went to her temple to get the Sentinels, and a direct confesion. That's what she was talking about in her grimoire, by the way. Not possession, but rather an inheritance of sorts. As her body is human, she passes down the divinity through the generations, as well as, what I assume is, the title of Flemeth. I mean, we could go and talk to her and the others?"

"And why should I believe this, even for a second?"

"Do you want to know about Arlathan from a primary source, or not? Because the four of us are also all fluent in spoken and written Elvhen. By the way, I'm kind of a new Creator as well. Fairly recent, it was about four months ago. Still no proper title yet, but I already kind of have a following amongst the Inquisition ranks. You'll find some of the elves here give a slightly different salute than the rest of the people here." Instead of the fist over the heart, the hand is slightly more relaxed, the thumb farther away from the palm, and the knuckles halfways uncurled. "A few humans, too. They get a different story, though. The Andrastian spin on it is that 'Andraste herself blessed me and let me rise up to immortality, to continue my good work here' or something like that." We get up to the rotunda.

In there is Mythal, Abelas, and Din'lathelan. Apparently, doing the same routine.

"Teldirthalelan." Idiot.

"Telal'samahlas." Stick in the mud.

A sigh from the middle of the room. "Da'lenen." Children.

"Not what I had thought of when you said there were ancient elves. And your Elvhen is wrong. The plural form of da'len is still da'len."

Din chuckles. "Let me guess, the Dalish taught you that, yes? If I've learned anything from all the elves out here, it's that the Dalish tend to be wrong. Quite a bit." Then a bit to herself more than the others, "Ha, the misconceptions on Sylaise's hair alone are baffling. It was _like_ fire. She was ginger. How would flames for hair work, anyways? Waste of mana, really."

"What about the dragon manifestations? Were those real, then?"

Four different voices, including mine, rang out a resounding "Yes." in unison.

"Mine is silver." I interject lightly.

"And the Dread Wolf? Where has he been taken to? Surely if you're here then he has been punished already, yes? You are, supposedly, the goddess of justice."

"I believe he's getting lunch right now. But he is much less forthcoming of his identity for fairly obvious reasons. Believe me when I say, however, that it is mostly undeserved."

Din smirks as she leans against the wall. I feel it's worth noting that she's in between the howling wolves portion of the mural. "Poor dharlin just mad a handful of very big, very bad mistakes is all."


	5. Things and Monsters

So, the whole 'Convince Lin to help' plan worked well! I still had enough time to sit and relax. And by relax, I mean playing video games until May comes down to yell at me. Which is what she's doing right now.

"... because you're immortal doesn't mean you can procrastinate this much, Danielle..." I'm not really listening.

Currently the game I'm playing is Undertale, because why the fuck not? But holy fuck, idea time!

"Hey, May? Sorry to interrupt your tirade, but. If Dragon Age is real, does that mean the other games are real, too?"

She stopped whatever she was yelling about, and gave me a wide eyed grin. "Oh, shit... Do you think we could go to other games?"

"We could certainly try!" The two of us make a mad dash to the rotunda. In there we find Solas and Flemeth. 

"Hey. Guys. On a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being flawless plan, 1 being everything obliterated. How great would it be to go to another world besides Thedas or our Earth?

Solas was the first to look up and responded immediately. "If you want to risk your own life, go ahead. I'll stay here, though."

"So is it possible, though?"

"I don't see why it wouldn't be..."

"Yeeee! Okay. So. Where to first?"

May thinks on it. "Ebbot? Least dangerous to try out first. Unless we end up in Underfell, we should be good there."

"Oh! Yeah! We could have a pun war with Snas!"

"Sans."

"Snas."

"Ok, whatever. You can have a pun war with him either way. Personally, I really want to know what Tori's pie tastes like. Plus, imagine what the wishing room looks like un-pixelated!"

I open up a window to the Fade, and concentrate on getting to the Underground. Another window opened up to a dark room, the cieling emanating a blue glow.

The two of us look up, then at each other. Simultaneously, we whispered. "Waterfall..."

I run West until I find myself at a sentry station. An empty Sentry station. "Hm."

"H-hey! Stop running off like that!" May was out of breath already.

Just as she finished her sentence, a vworp sound came from the right. "... well then. this is new."

Sans had probably just gotten back from Grillby's. He looks shocked. Did I do the thing again? I look down and... yep. Wearing my Megalovania shirt. I look over to May and realize she's wearing her Papyrus shirt. It was funny to be matching, so I gave her the shirt. Now I'm kind of regretting it. But not that much. "Oh, hey. Why don't you hear a lot of burger jokes?"

Sans' eyes snapped from our shirts to my face, narrowing slightly. "why...?"

I get that shit eating grin and May preemptively groans. "'Cause they're a rare medium well done."

A beat of silence.

Two people hysterically laughing, and one just looking done with life.

"so. mind patellin me what two humans are doing in the middle of Waterfall? much less how you got herewithout anyone else seeing you."

"Pfft... You aren't the only one who can teleport. I just happen to be able to move between universes, too! I've time travelled before, but that wasn't my fault. As for the why? Because you guys are rad as hell, and it's April Fools day, so we can be as self-indulgent as we want without judgement from the- well, in your position, the anomalies, in mine the... hm. Dunno what they are, but they're there. Right now, about... 121 people. Before it was somewhere in the 2,000's, but... sequels."

May and Sans look taken aback. But May was the first to question. "What do you mean, Danielle?"

"Well, as far as I can tell, we have an audience. Dunno who the Player is for this one, but for us there's an Author? Another Player? Director? Dunno what kind of media we are exactly. It's fuzzy. I mean, I told you, our life was like a shitty fanfiction. But, thing is... Omnipotence apparently includes extreme awareness when you want it. So... Yeah. There are people watching, or reading, or seeing or hearing? Observing us somehow. Not all the time, though, so. There's that."

"Yet another thing you never bothered mentioning... Well. I'll just file that away in a cabinet and let it get dusty."

Sans tenses up. "so you all have those guys, but what about this 'Player'?"

"Oh! A third entity in Frisk's mind that controls motor functions and speech to some extent. Think of it like a choice-based video game. 'Cause that's what it is to the Player. Where the choice, get this, is to kill or not to kill. Doesn't seem like a hard choice, but some people still choose to kill. That's when it stops being Frisk and the Player, and changes to Chara in Frisk and the Player. Oh, hey. Speak of the demon-child!"

Frisk walks up to us, and is thrown off by the group. Understandable. Usually Sans isn't here. Neither are two adult-ish humans.

They lift a brow and point at us, turning to Sans. "oh, them? just a couple of people spreading existential crises. don't mind them." Frisk looked worried. That's not good.

"Heyo! Name's Danielle!" I wave my marked hand, which glowed for a second. Hm.

Frisk just gives a small wave.

Hm. How to let them know I am friend. Ah! I kneel down to be on eye level with them. "Hey. You know the secret code, right?"

They nod slowly, brows furrowing.

I stage whisper conspiratorily. "I am the legendary fartmaster."

They giggle, and oh my Me, they are so adorable. I want ten.

"so. what's the deal with the shirts, then? not to say i don't appreciate my brother getting some merchandise, but why is that a thing?" He points to my shirt.

"Oh!  Because you're a huge badass when you wanna be, and I can appreciate that? Because Megalovania is one of my favorite songs on the whole soundtrack? Because your fight is really really fun?"

Frisk furrowed their brows even more, and opened their eyes. Red. "So, you're the elusive partner in crime?"

"Ha! Nah. I always reset before Sans actually dies or anything. I always just fight and lose til I get bored, then accept his 'mercy' and reset then. Besides, after I learned how, I just used the code to let me fight him without killing everyone else."

My mark glows even brighter. May has been watching it."Okay... that is disconcerting."

I raise my hand. "Hm. Time limit? That's a wierd way to end this, but okay." A window is opened on its own, and we head back.

Well, that was fun.


End file.
